At the Intersection of Faith and Life

What is the Matter with Us?

2011-11-13T16:35:00.001-08:00

Recently I heard that the First Lady was booed at NASCAR Event promoting "Joining Forces" a program to support Military families. It seems to me that there is now no lower limit on how disrespectful we can be.

I believe that much of this disrespect stems from a common root cause. Whatever the social ill: booing the wife of a president, political gridlock, bullying, class warfare, sexual aggression, human trafficking, ethnic, religious, and racial hatred, it all stems from a lack of respect. Obviously a lack of respect for others, but less obviously, a lack of respect for ourselves. As human beings, we should recognize our common humanity, our common vulnerabilities and our need for mutual support.

We may not and most likely cannot respect all the actions of our fellow humans, but at least we can acknowledge their humanity. It amazes me how quickly that we, who consider ourselves "nice", civil, and even religious people, can so easily go from laughing with others to laughing at others. How quickly we disdain those who think differently than us, who believe differently, or who have fallen into some misfortune of circumstance or personal weakness.

For those of us who consider ourselves believers, how much more that awareness should be. In the book of Genesis, we read that human beings are "created in the Image of God". If we are believers and premise human existence on that statement, then we must accept that we and every other human being has infinite value. If each human being has infinite value, then they are entitled to respect. If we believe the "Good Book" and accept it as the explanation of our present existence and future hope, then we should take heed to the Psalm:

Blessed is the one who does not walk in step with the wicked or stand in the way that sinners take or sit in the company of mockers...

For those who are not religious, but otherwise consider themselves "respectable" people, then consider this quote from Immanuel Kant:

“Men are respectable only as they respect.”

It is not a great distance from occupying the "seat of mockers" to becoming the object thereof.

One of a Kind

2011-08-07T13:21:00.001-07:00

Moses Feliciano Ricardo Boquiren (1960 - 2011)

A friend passed away recently and not just a friend to me, but a friend to all. I could not let the end of his life pass by without comment.

I first met Moses back in 1999 at a church spaghetti dinner. My wife and I were visiting (first time visitors in fact), and we did not want to be presumptive about including ourselves in the spaghetti luncheon. We were about to leave when Moses caught us and invited us to stay. We declined and told him "go and have lunch with your church family". Moses said, "you are family" and so we stayed..... for years.

That was Moses. Radically inclusive. Radically welcoming. He was one of those very few people who was always "fully present" with you. When you were in his presence, you felt like you were the only person in the room.

Moses not only made you feel welcome, he made you laugh. He always had a joke on the tip of his tongue. He was a story teller and you found you could listen to his stories for hours. You left his presence feeling glad about the encounter.

He had a way of ingratiating himself with any person or any group. We took a trip to Ohio once and had dinner as the guests of an Amish family. The Amish children were fascinated with his Asian features. They asked him about his obviously non-Amish appearance. Moses explained that he was a "Flexican"....a Phillipino-Mexican.

At his standing-room-only funeral (which is a statement in itself), I saw so many different people, White, Black, Hispanic, Asian, white collar, blue collar, and clerical collar. I heard stories about how he helped people, encouraged people, inspired people, and led people to faith.

In my estimation, Moses demonstrated living a Christian life better than most. His life and the testimonies about him have been an inspiration to me. I hope that I can learn from his example and become more inclusive, more encouraging, and more fully present with those who I encounter. By so doing I hope I can honor his life and honor the gift of God that he was to so many.

Freedom from Tyranny

2011-07-04T07:07:00.000-07:00

On this particular 4th of July (2011), I was thinking about the greatest tyranny we have ever faced.....ourselves and "our way of life." Over the past half century, we have relied on government protection, government entitlements, government assistance, and armed intervention in foreign lands to secure these "blessings of liberty" and "our way of life". The trouble is that we have consumed more of life than we were been willing to pay for at the time. And now the bill has come due.....$14,000,000,000,000.

One way to put that number in perspective is see what it would really take to pay it down compared to other nations (see Sovereign Debt Chart). To reduce our debt to only 60% of GDP by 2026 will require 94% of our GDP (our entire economic output)! That is astounding figure!

The amounts being debated in Washington are downright paltry compared to the sums needed to get ahead of the growing debt. As absurd as it is to say we are not raising the debt ceiling this year, it is equally absurd to say that taxes breaks are not going to be cut or that taxes are not going to be raised for all of us.

Before we get our righteous indignation riled up at "big government", we should ask ourselves have we ever taken our turn at the government trough? Have we ever used a government subsidized housing loan? student loan? collected SSA benefits? filed a medicare claim? eaten clean food? drank clean water? breathed clean air? advocated for involvement in Iraq or Afghanistan? Those two wars alone will account for $4 trillion of our debt.

So this fourth, let us celebrate the blessings of our liberty and our way of life as Christmas in July, but with an eye towards "February" when the credit cards come due. The greatest threat to the freedom of our nation is not some cell of terrorists. The greatest threat to freedom is insolvency.

"The borrower is servant to the lender" - Proverbs 22:7

A Son-in-Law’s Memories

2011-04-03T17:52:00.000-07:00

Van Zissimos March 30, 1920 - March 18, 2011

I first met Van Zissimos when I started dating my wife in 1980. Two months later, I proposed. Knowing that I was marrying into a traditional Greek family, I went to my future father-in-law and asked for permission to marry his daughter. He replied “If you love her enough.” Though the reply caused me a short bout of cold feet, I soon became his son-in-law. I also gained a father-in-law…..the best father-in-law that anyone could ask for!

My Boy
Once I was in the family, I was really in. You only had to watch the “Greek Wedding” movie to understand. He fondly referred to me as “My Boy.” I was always welcome in his house as he was welcome in mine. We only lived two miles from each other, so he was a continual presence at our home. So much a presence that the conception of my children hung in the balance.

I’m Having a Problem
I was so welcomed and so included in his family, that he had no problem calling me when he had a problem. “Alex my boy” he would begin, “I’m having a problem with my…..car, furnace, TV, ….”. On the surface of it, it sounded like he was just asking for advice, but this was really a coded request for me to come over and fix it for him.

Coffee and Pie
Van enjoyed his pie and coffee after dinner. I often shared pie and coffee with him, usually at his kitchen table. Sometimes I would bring dessert over and sometimes he would get a pie at the grocery store, but to sit at the same table and fellowship over a pie and coffee was his joy.

Rails and Ties
You did not have to hang around my father-in-law long to learn that he was a railroad man through and through. Through the years Van taught me all there was to know about railroad switching, braking, conducting, and “humping cars”. Before you let that phrase leave a questionable mental picture in your mind, “humping cars” just means pushing rail cars to the top of the hill in the yard and then allowing the car to roll back down, using switches to route them to the train you were building.

Red Lobster
Though I now live 30 miles away, I still go to the same family dental practice near father-in-law's home. Following the afternoon appointment, I would drop by and ask him if he would like to go out to eat. Sometimes he was in a funk when I first got there, but after a while he would brighten up and say, “Alex my boy, do you want to go out to eat? How about Red Lobster?” So off we would go to Red Lobster. Rainbow Trout was his favorite. After Red Lobster, we went over to Culver’s for his favorite treat, a pineapple sundae. As an added bonus, Culvers has free Wi-Fi, so I would bring my corporate laptop along, and we would catch up on the latest pictures of his great-grandson on Facebook.

Thankful
My father-in-law was always thankful for his family. He lived for holiday gatherings and meals. As patriarch of the family, he often took the lead to say grace. In fact, he took the lead no matter whose house he was in and that was OK. He never forgot how he came to this country with nothing and how God had blessed him with children and great grandchildren. I will never cease to be thankful to God for bringing him into my life that I might marry his daughter and be blessed with a family of my own.

His Faith and Hope
The most important thing you would learn about my father-in-law was his faith in Christ. It was unshakeable. Despite all the struggles he had been through, he maintained a solid faith and confidence in God, even to the last days of his life. It was a confidence that could not be faked, especially in the throes of a terminal illness.

See You When I get There
Just before he passed, I told my father-in-law that I would see him when I get to the other side. And I fully expect to. My confidence is in the same God who brought us to together. When you consider the series of coincidences that allowed the paths of Van Zissimos and Mary Cutrubus to converge at a Coney Island on the southwest side of Detroit, you realize how improbable, how unlikely it is that I have my family today. It has been said that coincidences are miracles where God chooses to remain anonymous. It was a miracle that I met my father-in-law at all. And I am confident in the miracle that will allow me to see him again.

The Lord's Table

2010-10-25T17:17:00.001-07:00

The other day, our "small group" met after a long hiatus from formal meetings during the summer. Many of us have been busy with travel, visiting out-of-state family, children's high school activities, college graduations, exchange student host family meetings. You get the idea.

So, we finally met on a Saturday night and had Pizza together. Usually, we have a more formal study in the living room. But somehow, this day we started our meeting around the kitchen table. We pulled up a few more chairs and began to read the devotional prepared by our small group leader and dear friend. Our devotional was a prayer by Henri Nouwen:

Dear God,
I am so afraid to open my clenched fists!
Who will I be when I have nothing left to hold on to?
Who will I be when I stand before you with empty hands?
Please help me to gradually open my hands
and to discover that I am not what I own,
but what you want to give me.
And what you want to give me is love—
unconditional, everlasting love.
Amen.

As I thought about our gathering around the kitchen table, it occurred to me:
- a lot of love, forgiveness, and grace have kept us together at that table over the last few years
- we are struggling to make it in this economy....
- we have been disappointed with people and circumstances...
- we all want to honor God with our plans and our service and yet....
- our lives are being led in directions we would not have chosen for ourselves....
- we continue to look out for each other (job referrals, car repairs, house-sitting, prayers)...
- we have visited each other in hospitals and emergency rooms...
- we know if we were in trouble and had just one phone call, who we would call...

It was good to sit close around that table, look each other in the eye, and realize how much we love each other. The pizza may not have been "eucharist" in the technical, theological sense, but it was the bread we broke together.

While we are on that thought, why wouldn't the table we gathered around be the Lord's table? How would such a table where believers gather in His name, forgiven, in peace and unconditional acceptance not be the Lord's table? How is it that at times we allow ourselves to succumb to the dualism where we separate new life, forgiveness, and restored fellowship at the Lord's Table from the reality of life shared around any table?

A Moving Event

2010-06-13T16:41:00.000-07:00

I recently helped my son and his family move from an apartment to a condo in Chicago. I knew that members of his church were going to help, but on the day of the move I was unprepared for what I saw. Here it was, 9 am on a Saturday morning and 20 people showed up! All it took was an announcement at a previous Sunday service.

Passing boxes and pieces of furniture along a human chain, it took only an hour to empty out their 1200 square foot apartment. After driving over to the new address, the human chain was re-formed from the truck into the long hallway, material was unloaded, and passed along to their destined rooms.

I've been intrigued by the idea of Christian community as described in Acts 2:44-46, perhaps even a bit obsessed. I had been trying to figure out why community is so hard to ignite and maintain in the church. To be honest, I had nearly given up hope that such a life is even possible in modern society...until I saw a quarter of the church turn out for a move of one of their members! What is remarkable was that this level of mutual helpfulness is a common occurrence in their congregation. At mile-posts on the road of life, they are there for each other.

Coincidentally, I have been reading the book Peculiar People by Rodney Clapp. It is a book about the church as culture in a post-Christian society. One quote in particular captures the essence of what I have been looking for: "Reclaiming Christianity as culture enables us to move from de-contextualized propositions to....inhabitable truths."

Much of our difficulty as the Church or as individual believers is that the gospel we share is a de-contextualized proposition: "Jesus is the Answer!" we proclaim. "What was the question?" would be the response of many. They might add, "so how does what you proclaim make a difference in your life? You go to work, go home, roll-down the garage door, watch hours of TV, surf the Internet, and live in relative isolation.....just like the rest of us!"

Modern society, culture, and the church (as organization) leaves little space for friendship. Our relationships for the most part derive from utility. We maintain just enough relationship, just enough cordiality to get what we want: a task completed, some help, or a commitment to service. Once the task or service is complete, so is the friendship. If we are not intentional, then we will follow that path by default. Unfortunately that is not the path of true friendship, the friendship Christ offers to us, enables through us, and what ultimately the world will recognize as something different.

If we desire a better life, a life that is truly life, a life of following Christ, what are we to do? Rodney Clapp suggests we begin where we are. In our job, in our neighborhood, in our church. He suggests making space for friendship and relationship. To deliberately slow down in favor of a deeper relationship, even if tasks don't get done quite as fast as we would like. Once we are aware of how the world with its task-oriented, get-as-many-things-done-as-fast-as-possible-at-all-costs attitude poisons us, we are in a position to reclaim true friendship and community.

How are We Different?

2010-05-17T17:31:00.000-07:00

If we worry about the future like the rest of the world, have no peace like the rest of the world, if we love our friends and hate our enemies like the rest of the world, then how are we different than the rest of the world?

The Meaning of Life

2010-01-04T16:15:00.000-08:00

This Christmas I received a book from my son, "The Gulag Archipeligo" by Solzhenitsyn. He thoughtfully selected the book because of my interest in the great Russian writers. You might be familiar with the term "Gulag" and that it refers to Russian prison camps. The book is aptly titled because it is a detailed account of the entire process of spying, betrayal, interrogation, torture, confession, and imprisonment for millions of Russians.

After reading the first three chapters, I was overwhelmed. A neighbor, an acquaintance, or a friend could make the most incidental comment that could cause you to be arrested. For the most benign comment or no cause at all if a quota had to be met, you could be arrested and sentenced to no less than 10 years hard labor. From the October revolution of 1917 through the post-war years, huge swaths of the population were caught up in a system that not only presumed you had to be guilty of something, but preemptively punished you just in case.

I was astounded at the wholesale destruction of human dignity on such a vast scale. I was so overwhelmed, I had to put the book down for a time. With such pervasive accusation, betrayal, cruelty, fear, and suspicion inflicted on so many people, how could its effects not be felt for generations? Indeed the effects are being felt to the present day. A recent NPR feature titled "Epidemic of Addiction Threatens Russia's Future" describes the widespread alcohol and drug use that plagues Russian society today.

So what can I do? Perhaps not much for Russia. Russia is inaccessible to me both geographically and linguistically. Because of emigration and the internet, people may become accessible to me who otherwise would not be. But I don't have to go to Russia or seek out Russian people. I don't have to look far to find people in pain and people that are addicted. Regardless of where we are in the world, the motivation for addiction is the same: to anesthetize pain and salve lack of purpose.

I cannot arrogantly presume that I know the existential angst that my friends and acquaintances may or may not be feeling. However, I can safely assume that, as much as human beings need food, clothing, and shelter, they need meaning. The fact that I am a Christian does not put me in a superior position; it only means that I have started on a purposeful journey. Viktor Frankl said, "our meaning in life is found as we help others find their meaning in life." That is why the answer is so elusive. We think we can find it by ourselves. It cannot be found on our own, as an individual pursuit, but only as we help others find it!

There is No Turning Back...

2009-12-30T16:14:00.000-08:00

As the final two days of 2009 draw to a close, I am looking back at the road I have travelled this year. What has become especially clear to me is that we are are all created in the image of God. Even when the divine image is marred and barely recognizable, it is there and is worth restoring. I have come to realize that Christ's mission is to facilitate the recovery of the divine image (Colossians 3:10) in humanity. Moreover, I have understood that my mission is the recovery of the divine image in others.

So what exactly does "recovery of the divine image" mean? It means the recovery of human dignity. I find that people are so beat down these days. They are ashamed at having to receive assistance for the first time in their lives. Young people are disillusioned that they can't begin an independent life in this economy. And then there are those who are enslaved by addiction.

My perspective has changed in the past year because I have allowed my heart to be touched with the stories that people tell. Where there is discouragement, disillusionment, or addiction, there is always a story behind it.

I have learned that people don't need our pity, they need our respect. Respect comes from our recognition that we share the divine image and that we have the same value before God.

More than respect, people need love. How empty, how alone, how isolated we are if no one loves us. If no one cares if we live or die, what greater pain is there?

I have learned that the only legitimate expression of faith is love. I believe that God sees our love. I've learned that if I want to find Christ, He is in "the least of these."

I've learned these things and I can't go back....

Can Bankruptcy be a New Beginning?

2009-11-10T17:21:00.000-08:00

The worst thing that can happen in our modern economy is to go bankrupt. It is essentially the death of our independence. In declaring bankruptcy, we admit that we have come to the end our resources. We throw ourselves on the mercy of the courts for protection from our creditors. A judge decides if there is any hope of viability and if there is not, he orders liquidation. If there is hope, the judge orders development of a new business plan. No more "business-as-usual."

Working in the auto industry I have observed first hand my company go through bankruptcy. Long before the crisis, we operated at a loss more years than not. But we always had enough cash reserve, enough credit, and the really deep pockets of a parent company to cover up the negative slope of our trend line. We knew the trend would cross zero one day, but we deluded ourselves that "some day" was in the distant future. Until that day came, we kept paying people to build product and buy product that no one really wanted. The long-term assumptions and fatal errors continued. We had no incentive to change....until the bottom fell out. The day of reckoning had come! So, what does bankruptcy have to do with with faith and life?

To become a Christian and live out a full life of discipleship, we must accept our personal bankruptcy. Without coming to the end our resources and the end of ourselves, we cannot truly follow Christ as His disciples. Instead we are left with our own presumption of grace. We know that a price was paid, but we have no idea how much, because we assumed we never really needed it. Our salvation has no real value. It's just a given.

We must also face the corporate bankruptcy of our churches and denominations. The trend line will cross zero one day. It is a cop-out to say "the way is narrow" and "few there be that find it". More likely our decline is due to the fact that we are increasingly disconnected from society and have become insular. All our energies are used to preserve the status quo. We become inconsequential to those around us. We become irrelevant to society at large. We are salt that has lost its savor.

But perhaps we will be able to step out of ourselves and our churches long enough to recognize the trend lines. We might just see that we aren't having much of a redemptive effect on those around us. May God give us the incentive to change. May He help us to make the painful and necessary changes that we might become outposts of His Kingdom in this world. Individually and collectively.

You'll End up Giving Your Life....

2009-07-20T17:39:00.000-07:00

Over the last couple of weeks I've had a chance to watch a couple of movies produced by the Eastwood family: (Clint and his kids) "Gran Torino" and "Rails and Ties". In each movie, the theme is the same: the principal character is hardened by life, miserable in their misanthropy, until they encounter people in their lives who somehow manage to break the shell around their hearts. Once that shell cracks, they find themselves feeling and then acting on compassion they have developed for others. What is catalytic in bringing out that compassion differs in each story. In one story, it is the unrelenting kindness of strangers. In the other case, it is guilt, regret, and finally the need of an orphan child that does it.

I loved these movies because they are stories of redemption. I've also learned something from them: if you start loving people, get involved in their lives and all their pain, you'll end up giving your life for others. This is the path of following Christ. If you allow Christ to break all the hardness around your heart, you will become vulnerable to pain and need of others. When that happens, comforting others means more to you than avoiding your own pain. In the end, you will give up your life. In doing so, you will find it!